Is There Such A Thing As A Happy Marriage?

Call me a skeptic but I really don't know any happy marriages. Basically marriage is a sacrifice of losing your self in that other person. Is anyone really worth losing your personhood? Basically every person loves themself so why would they give up their life to that other person?

For example I lost my right to watch sports because it would be considered selfish to watch sports while ignoring my dear wife. I also gave up playing sports because weekends was time to spend together. I gave up going for long pointless walks where destination was not an objective because her feet always hurt. I took up supermarket shopping and long boring conversations where 90% of it was gossip, where I had to nod my head feigning interest.

It works both ways. She also gave up personhood for the sake of marriage. Since she cheated on me with various younger, better looking guys, I assume she felt that with me she was giving up a certain freedoms that she needed to express. A certain flirtatiousness, thrill of the chase, new lips, newer, younger, better looking, thinner bodies. Why should she not pursue her life's desires? Why should she limit herself to one person, me?

As for me, I am staying strong and not pursuing any romantic ties with her. Oh by the way, we have a child. Don't want to lose my child by going through the system of injustice (family court). As for her, I think she is okay. Separate rooms, separate beds. In a sense I would like to see remorse from her, but in another sense I don't because I truly want a break-up.

That's all for now. Another gray purposeless day lies ahead. For you singles, don't rush into marriage, it's not all it's cracked up to be. For you divorcees engaged to be married again, you have no excuse, open your blind eyes.

Got Cheated On

A couple of weeks ago I found out that wifey was cheating on me. I hate her for it. I can never be with her again. The gentlemen in question were all at least 10 years younger than me. Thin. Good looking. There's a turn of events for you - I got traded in for a younger, better looking model.

I'm disgusted 3 weeks later regarding any posibility of future relationships with any women. I was browsing blogs and came across a real doozy http://marriedwifeblog.blogspot.com/ This is a wife who cheats on her husband with various lovers and the fool husband has no clue. I left her a piece of my mind on her Sept. 23rd blog. I seriously doubt she will post my comment which requires her approval.

Anyway. Today is a bad day. I am in a gray mood. Can't stop thinking about it. Unaccounted time is time that I feel she spends with any of these guys. She changed her phone number, stopped seeing her slut friend (yeah right), but I ask a simple question. If 3 weeks ago this was okay for her to do, then why would it not be okay with her now? Because I found out? What happens when time passes and she stops walking on eggshells, will she go back to what she feels is right? Will she simply be more careful next time? Let her do so. It's her life, and she is free to do as she wishes.

I also say this shocking statement. I am free to accept her behavior and just turn a blind eye to the whole thing. As of today I am strong in my resolve to never have a relationship that is romantic with this woman again.